Surprisingly audacious reflections of
a humble writer
DOPEY AND SLEEPY, BUT NOT HAPPY OR LITERALLY LETTING THE CAT OUT OF THE BAG
Putt-Putt is the black and white stray cat that we feed and care for.
Our family thought it would be a good idea to take him in for a check-up with our veterinarian.
The big question was, how do you catch a cat that doesn't want to be caught? A friend suggested that I give him a sedative. I thought that was brilliant.
I explained the situation to my vet and he approved a mild sedative. The following morning, I crushed only a quarter of the tablet and put it in his food.
Within five minutes his eyes were glassy. I gently slipped the cloth laundry bag over him and pulled the drawstring.
Well, that was easy. Putt-Putt only had to sleep for a few hours until his appointment.
And then, Putt-Putt must have realized something was not quite right. No ground beneath his paws. No blue skies overhead. He went berserk. Lord have mercy, this cat was on a mission to escape faster than Harry Houdini.
I called my husband's cell.
It was 6:00 am.
"Jim. Hurry. I need you to go get the pet carrier."
"What? Where are you?"
"I'm on the deck with Putt-Putt. He's trying to get out of the bag."
Putt-Putt was not trying to get out of the bag, he was DETERMINED to get out of the bag.
My loving and devoted husband knew ahead of time what I had hoped to accomplish. He scrambled out of bed and dashed into the garage for the carrier and began to climb the steps to the deck where I had one unhappy supposedly-drugged cat.
He arrived just in time to see Putt-Putt slice the bag and tear it to shreds with his claws.
No problem, he'll probably calm down and sleep it off. I mean, he's doped up. Right?
Putt-Putt took off like a
I hadn't counted on him getting agitated and scared. I expected him to take one long cat nap.
Then an enormous amount of guilt swallowed me up. Here was this sedated cat that I love disappearing to who knows where and it was all because of me.
I had visions of my beloved stray being hit by a car. Chased by a dog. Carried away by a hawk.
If you've ever seen the movie The Proposal with Kevin the dog (replace Kevin with Putty) you'll know what I mean.
I searched the neighborhood and called for him throughout the morning meanwhile swearing I would never ever try this stunt again.
By early afternoon, Putt-Putt returned to sleep on our deck. Unharmed. When he awoke, I had a big dish of sedative-free cat food waiting for him.
As for getting him in to the vet and having his health checked out, I'm not sure that's going to happen.
All ideas sound good theoretically at first. The same is true with writing or any other task. Some ideas work, others don't. You've got to try and see.
But if the idea sounds questionable from the very start and it includes a cat, it's probably best to scratch it.
Listen to Randi Lynn read Dopey and Sleep, but not Happy...
CWW is published twice a month.
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