January 3, 2025

heirlooms, stolen heirlooms, losing and finding
                                                                                                                                           Photo: Tiffany Anthony
THE MISSING PEARLS 


I have a catchphrase I use whenever something goes missing: someone stole it.   

For instance, thirty-some years ago when my husband and I were moving into our new house, a box of valuables went missing.  I looked everywhere for it and came to the conclusion that garbage men must have taken it.  Which turned out to be absurd and oh so wrong.  The box eventually turned up.  

But now this catchphrase is the only explanation for the empty mother-of-pearl jewelry box that sits on my nightstand.  This case held something special, something personal, something beautiful and delicate—a double strand pearl necklace that belonged to my bubbie.  

I had rummaged through every dresser drawer.  I've looked under the bed.  I've searched the closet: on shelves of folded sweaters, inside shoes, between clothes on hangers, and behind hats, under laundry baskets and bookbags.  I turned the bedroom upside down and inside out, looked high and low and knew in my heart the necklace had been ripped off.   

Over the years, we've had painters and carpenters in the house.  It never occurred to me to hide the necklace.  The pearls flowed freely from the jewelry box like a beaded waterfall, but I never thought it would interest others, invite others, tantalize and tempt.  So, I beat myself up for being so careless, for not guarding something that I loved and valued.   

My husband assured me it would show up.  But he was wrong.  Even though I have no proof someone took it, I had a lingering suspicion that the necklace had been lifted and I laid the blame on others.   

You could say buy another.  But that's not the point.  A new necklace would never do.  I want the necklace that graced my grandmother's neck. 

My bubbie worked at the grocery store she and my grandfather owned.  On her feet Monday through Friday.  Never complained.  She was a kind person who extended credit to people for kosher meat, knowing they probably would never be able to pay their bills.  She rarely wore the necklace—she and my grandfather didn't go out that much.  But I like to imagine she reached for the pearls whenever she went to synagogue. I can see her touching them lightly as she recited, "Barukh Attah Adonai Eloheinu Melekh ha-Olam, O Lord our God, King of the universe." 

It's been ten years and counting since I've last seen the pearls.  I am crushed they are missing—the pearls held memories of my grandmother.  It was a physical way I could connect with her.  

I used to imagine a package arriving.  A small package without a return address.  A package wrapped in regret.  I would rip it open and find the necklace.  It would be accompanied with a note:  I believe this belonged to you. 

But I know this would never happen.  The necklace was gone for good.   

I think of my grandmother and sweet memories arise and my skin tingles as if she's passed right through me.  Her heavenly voice says, "You don't need pearls to have me nearby."  

The small jewelry box still rests on my nightstand.  It's a reminder of loss and love. 

You might think this is the end of the story, but there's more.  

As you may have guessed, I never received a package with a note and the necklace. Such is the stuff of dreams.

But during the Christmas break, I mentioned the stolen jewelry to my daughter and she told me she had a double strand necklace. I was so wrapped up believing in my little catchphrase, so convinced the necklace had been stolen that I had forgotten I’d given it to her.

The jewelry box is empty and it will remain empty, not because I don’t have other items for it, but because it serves as a reminder. A reminder of something missing and then found. Of something loved and valued. Of something special. Of something personal, beautiful, and delicate.  Of something passed down.  My daughter keeps her great grandmother’s necklace—and it belongs with her.  

 À la prochaine!